Managing Pregnancy Anxiety
Let’s talk about anxiety during pregnancy!
In general, just thinking about pregnancy can be intimidating. The topic produces anxiety because the essential truth is that every pregnancy is different. What one person experiences most likely differs from the experience of someone else. Even the path to getting pregnant can look very different from one person to the next. But no matter if your path to pregnancy was long or short, a surprise or hard won, anxiety during pregnancy is extremely common. For some, this may manifest as small worries. What will my birth experience be? Will my OB be on rotation when I go into labor? For others, anxiety might feel completely overwhelming and consume more of the pregnancy experience than joy.
There are risk factors for high anxiety while pregnant such as previous diagnosis of an anxiety disorder, previous losses or infertility, age, and pregnancy complications. For many people the anxiety during pregnancy - or the way it manifests - may feel like a surprise. Acknowledging, confronting, and managing the symptoms of anxiety during a major life transition like pregnancy is absolutely essential for overall mental well being.
Consider some of these tips to lessen your anxiety symptoms:
Curate a support system.
Being pregnant can be incredibly isolating, especially in the beginning when you may not look pregnant and may not feel comfortable telling everyone you are pregnant. Pick a few people you feel safe being vulnerable with, who you feel comfortable venting to or asking for assistance when things get tough. Then use them, they’re there to support you!
Make a mental health plan.
Creating a social support system is great, but nothing compares to professional support when anxiety gets really tough. It may be helpful to find a therapist before things feel unmanageable, or at least look up a few perinatal therapists (like this list from Moms Mental Health Initiative in Milwaukee) in your area who you can call if anxiety starts to impact other areas of life. Peer support and groups can also be a great option. A mental health plan may also include a list of your favorite coping skills. What are skills that have worked in the past when you experienced high levels of anxiety? How can you keep those skills in front of mind and use them when anxiety starts to feel manageable? What are red flags that your support system should be aware of?
Be honest with your OB or midwife about how you’re really feeling.
Tell your doctor at the beginning of your pregnancy journey if you are predisposed to anxiety or are worried it might creep up for you, and be candid with them about any increase in symptoms. Your doctor should be able to connect you with valuable resources if you are direct with them about your anxiety. Your provider can also be a great resource for confronting misinformation about anxiety medications during pregnancy (or check out the PERISCOPE project if your provider is uncertain about meds). You can even plan with them for postpartum - if you think you may want or need meds or other treatment at some point after delivery, bring it up with them before giving birth and talk through what some options might be so that you can move quickly if needed when you’re in the thick of it.
Cut down on anxiety fueled research.
Research can be great if we are using empirically validated sources, and using that research to feel secure and empowered in our decisions. But if we have anxiety, too much research can actually be harmful to our mental health. Have you ever looked to the internet for reassurance, found five articles that make you feel better, but found one nugget of information that makes you feel worse? Choose a resource, often this will be your OB or other provider, and allow yourself to trust their expertise. Remind yourself that no amount of research will absolve you of anxiety. It’s easier said than done, but get off the internet and trust your people. Having a baby is our greatest exercise in uncertainty, and when one anxiety goes away, another one will pop up. Give yourself permission to break the anxiety cycle. Next time you find yourself researching, remind yourself that the cure for your anxiety cannot be found on the internet. Put the phone down, write the questions down for your provider, and participate in mindful self care.
Know when to get help.
If you are experiencing negative thoughts - thoughts that are tough to distract from and feel all consuming - you should definitely reach out to your medical team or a mental healthcare provider. While some anxiety can be manageable on your own, if you are having anxiety preventing you from a good night's sleep, eating, or having fulfilling social interactions, or thoughts of self harm, you should seek support from a perinatal therapist.
