The COVID 15
I’ve heard people make jokes about the COVID 15 - gaining weight while we are in shelter in place or quarantine.
Let’s stop that right now.
Why? Well…
Your worth does not change because you gain or lose weight.
We don’t need any extra shame, especially right now. Research has shown us that one of the leading areas women feel shame in is their appearance. Making comments like this, even in a joking way, contributes to the idea that there is one way to look and skinny is THE way to be worthy. It’s just not. Adding an additional level of stress or feeling of failure is so not what you need. You are worthy not for what you look like on the outside - worthiness is inherent. It has nothing to do with the car you drive or the job you have or your BMI. You are worthy of love and belong and joy and goodness for the simple fact that you are you. Building that can be a tricky thing. Check here for some guidance if you want to dig further.
Stress can cause weight gain. It’s goddamn science.
Here’s an article about how that can happen. In addition to the biology of higher cortisol levels, a lot of people seek emotional comfort in food or drinks. Or maybe your income has decreased and you’ve had to make some changes in your food source. Or maybe you never got takeout before, but now that you’re home and the kids are home, it is just what happens. Maybe you’re too tired to cook how you usually do. All of that is fine. We’re all in a collective trauma experience and most of us are hanging out in survival mode. (One caveat - if you are drinking excessively to numb your feelings or escape your life, you need additional help. This page has a questionnaire to consider if alcohol has become a problem for you or a loved one.)
That’s not what we want to teach our kiddos.
This one is super important to me. We know that children learn about body image at a very young age, so I am exceedingly cautious about the messages I want to give my children (including my son) about their bodies. They are beautiful they way they are, in any form. The appearance of their body is not what holds worth for them, or for any of us. I want them to know that we want our nourish our bodies with healthy food - but appearance is not the end game. How does my daughter interpret me being upset at myself for my pants not fitting? How is that message internalized for her about her own self worth? These kiddos are always watching, so I want to be careful about what I show them.
The Takeaway:
You are not a number on a scale. You are a human with so many facets and strengths.
You are worthy of love and belonging and good things, regardless of what you do or have.
You deserve to feel good about yourself.
Adding extra stress and shame onto your already-maxed-out self is not helpful.
